DESIRE.
Websters 1828 dictionary defines “desire” as this:
1. An emotion or excitement of the mind, directed to the attainment or possession of an object from which pleasure, sensual, intellectual or spiritual, is expected; a passion excited by the love of an object, or uneasiness at the want of it, and directed to its attainment or possession. Desire is a wish to possess some gratification or source of happiness which is supposed to be obtainable. A wish may exist for something that is or is not obtainable. Desire, when directed solely to sensual enjoyment, differs little from appetite. In other languages, desire is expressed by longing or reaching toward, and when it is ardent or intense, it approaches to longing, but the word in English usually expresses less than longing.
So what do we do about desire? Would it be wrong for me to not desire a fancy car? No, of course not. I just don’t want the payments. What about not desiring a dog? Does that mean I hate dogs? Of course not. I don’t have anything against dogs, I just don’t want one. So, would not desiring children be anymore wrong? I don’t think it would be.
Now before you think that I’m contradicting myself, let me explain. In my last post, I talked about the value of life and I pointed out how our society, as a whole, doesn’t value human life as much as it should. Try killing a spotted owl (an endangered species) or cutting down the rain forest, and you’ll see what our society puts “value” on. I argued that God puts a great deal of value on life. And, as we all know, human life begins as a child. Children are not valued in our society, at least not as much as the Bible teaches us they should be. But now I want to talk about those who don’t desire children.
I don’t think that a person who lacks the desire for children is anymore wrong then a person who lacks the desire for a dog. Not that I’m putting children in the same category as a dog, but there are some desires that we are not responsible for having/not having. Just as some people have the desire for many children, some people do not.
Where we do go wrong is when we put our desire above God’s desire. There is nothing wrong with admitting “I have never desired ________”. You are being honest. But there is something wrong with saying “I have never desired ___________, therefore I’m not going to do it/have it”. God’s desire, God’s will for our lives should be the utmost priority in our lives. How often is it? Having many children doesn’t make you Godly. Being good stewards of your money doesn’t make you Godly. Being a stay-at-home mother who home schools your children, doesn’t make you Godly. Obeying God’s desire for your life does.
If you are obeying His desire, that means you are listening to Him. You are reading His word. You are praying/talking to Him. He is your priority. As Holly from Seeking Faithfulness (scroll to the bottom to read the beginning of her story titled “Our Story”) has admitted, she didn’t always have the desire for many children. She and her husband were fine with 2 or 3 of them. But God convicted her that her desire for a “normal” amount of children wasn’t right. And that she was putting her desires before God’s. Another woman, Donna Carter, talks about her desires for a large family, but that wasn’t what God had planned for her. You can read about her story here (her story is titled “Homeschooling Only One: A Journey to Contentment”).
Will He convict everyone this way? No. Not everyone is made to have a large family. And not everyone is made to have only 1 or 2 children. You see, the number of children is not the important thing. How our hearts are and how we stand before Him is. We need to be willing and ready to lay our desires at His feet and to say “Yes Lord” to what He has to say in response. This needs be applied to all aspects of our lives, in every situation.
So in conclusion, we need to value life as the Lord values life. We are all made in His image and we are all precious in His sight. We also need to be willing and ready to lay our desires, our will before Him. And to except what His will is for our lives, whatever it may be. Don’t lose sight of the fact that He knows what is best for us and what we can handle. For He is the one who made us and He knows us far better then we know ourselves.
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes. Fear the Lord and depart from evil.” Proverbs 3:5-7